小学英语趣味阅读
考试什么都去死吧-
小学生英语故事
英文幽默故事:
1
、
There was a
guy
(家伙,
伙计)
who went into a shop to buy a
parrot
(
鹦鹉)
.
There
were three parrots in the shop.
One was $$5,000;
another
(另一个)
one, $$10,000; and
the
t
hird
(第三)
one, $$30,000. The
customer
p>
(
顾客)
asked the owner, “How this guy
is $$5,000? T
hat‟s
so
expensive
(
贵的)
for this
kind
(
种类)
of parrot.” The
owner said,
“Because I have
trained
(训练)
him
and he can talk.” So the customer asked him,
“How about this guy? What can he do
that makes him so expensive?” The owner said,
“Well,
apart
from
(除了)
talking,
he can also do some
amusing
(有趣的)
actions
(动作)
,
like dancing and so on. That‟s why he‟s so
expensive.” Then the customer said,
“How about the third one? What
can
he do that makes him so
expensive?” The owner
of the shop
said, “I don‟t know.
Normally
(通常)
, I
have never heard him talk, nor
dance,
nor
whistle
(吹口哨)
,
nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call
him „The
Boss
(老板)
.
2
、
Where is the
egg?
Teacher:Can you
make a
sentence
(造句)
with
the word
Student:Yes.I ate
a
piece of
(一块)
cake
yesterday.
Tea
cher:Then
where is the “egg
Student:In
the cake,Sir.
3
、
Tom is a little
boy, and he is only seven years old. Once he goes
to a cinema. It is the
first time for
him to do that. He
buys
(买)
a
ticket
(
< br>票)
and goes in. But after
two or
three
minutes
(分钟)
he comes out, and buys the
second
(第二张)
ticket and goes
in again.
After a few minutes he comes out again and buys
the
third
(第三张)
ticket.
Two or three minutes
after that he comes out and asks for another
ticket. But a girl asks
him,“Why do you
buy so many tickets? How many friends do you
meet?” “No, I have
no friends here, but
a big woman always stops me at the door and
cuts up
(剪)
my
ticket.”
4
、
Teacher:
Would
Shakespeare
(莎士比亚)
be
a great man
if
he
were still alive
today?
Student:
Of course. He must be a great man, for
so
far
(
目前为止)
nobody has lived to
over 400
years.
5
、
Mr. Smith:
Waiter, there's a
dead
fly
(死苍蝇)
in my
soup
(汤)
.
Waiter: Yes, sir, I know---
it's the
heat
(热)
that
kills
(杀死)
it.
6
、
cotton-
wool
(棉花)
in your
ear? Is it
infected
(感染)
?
other , so I am
trying to stop it.
< br>7
、
Teacher
:
We all know that
beat causes an
object to expand an cold cauese it to
c
ontract
(热胀冷缩)
.
Now
,
can anyone give me a
good
example
(例子)
?
John
:
Well
,
in the summer the days are
long
,
and in the winter the
days are short.
8
、
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his
mother for two
cents
(分)
.
gave
(给)
you yesterday?
good
boy,
proudly
(骄傲地)
.
you so
interested
in
(感兴趣)
the old w
oman?
candy
.
(糖果)
p>
9
、
Drunk
(醉酒)
One day, a father and his little son
were going home. At this
age
(年龄)
, the boy
was
interested
in
(感兴趣)
all kinds
of things and was always
asking
questions
(问问
题)
.
Now, he asked,
meaning
(
意思)
of the word
'Drunk', dad?
son,
replied
(回答)
,
standing
(站着)
two policemen. If
I
regard
(认成)
the two
policemen
as
four then I am
drunk.
there's only ONE
policeman!
普通英语故事